Tag Archives: family

What I’m Thankful For….

Posted on November 22, 2012 | 1 Comment

I’m sure everyone has seen their family and friends doing “30 days of thanks” posts, right?  Well, I’m not one to do those sorts of things because it is way too much pressure to remember every day.  But, that doesn’t mean I’m not thankful for many things.  Quite the opposite in fact and with a move looming between Thanksgiving and Christmas I remind myself to think of the things to be thankful for.  So in one post here are the things I’m most thankful for having in my life.

1.  My husband! Without him I wouldn’t have this life and our two children.

2.  My kids!  They make me laugh every day and give me a reason to keep moving forward.

3.  My family.  Because of the support and love from my family, I feel strong enough to pack up and move to foreign lands because no matter how great or bad the current city is, we always have them.

4.  My milspouse friends!  Well, I just couldn’t survive without them!  They are my sisters bonded over this crazy military life.

5.  Health and dental care.  It might be a pain in the neck at times but I’m so lucky we have it because we have a kid who has already broken two bones and it was so awesome to take him to the ER and not worry about the cost.

6.  The abundance of resources.  No service member or their family should complain that there isn’t help.  There is something for everyone, you just have to look or ask.  Not many jobs out there offer everything from moving assistance to counseling for FREE.

7.  The opportunity to serve as an Ombudsman.  It was a true blessing for me to be able to give back to the Navy in that role.  Helping other spouses is where it is at!

8.  Stroller Warriors.  This group taught me real sisterhood!  I never thought joining a running group could be so much more than just running for 30 minutes a couple of times a week.

9.  Social media.  Without it I wouldn’t be able to stay connected with all my friends!  I get to watch their children grow up and know what is happening their every day lives.  I love, love, love it!!!!  Not to mention I can make sure my family sees my children and know what I’m doing everyday.

10.  This blog.  A year ago I was faced with not knowing where my life was going to go.  I knew we would move and I would have to resign my Ombudsman position and my youngest would be off to school.  When I published my first blog I had no way of knowing what a great community I was joining!

These are just 10 of my most thankful things.  What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?

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Tips To Help Kids Build Bonds With Family

Posted on October 26, 2012 | Leave a comment

It is a known fact that most military children will never live in the same town as their families.  Some do and those are the lucky ones.  They get to have weekend sleepovers with grandparents and Sunday dinners and long summer days playing with cousins.  But, what about the kids who don’t get those chances?  How do we, the parents, help build those crucial bonds with family?  Well, I’m happy to say that I think my husband and I and our families are achieving this.  Our children have never lived near family yet when we come together you would think they did.  They know where the toys are kept at their grandparent’s homes and ask their grandmothers for certain cups and foods.  The boys run and play with their cousins as if it is a weekly thing. So, how exactly have we made this happen?  With these tips…..

1.  Talking about family a lot!  We talk a lot about our families.  We discuss what is going on with them in their daily lives and show them where they live.  When our boys were toddlers/pre-schoolers we used to show them pictures and talk about who each person was and how they were related.  This is very helpful so that children know who everyone is when you do visit.

2.  Have a Skype account.  Being able to SEE our family over the last seven years has been amazing!  We personally don’t use Skype because we have Apple’s version of iChat but it is all the same.  Our families have loved being able to watch our children grow up and not just see pictures but actually live things.  Like our youngest when he learned to walk and both boys learning to talk.  My mother used to just like to watch them even if I was busy doing other things.  Virtually babysitter if you will.

3.  Make home movies or photobooks.  Every year we make a home movie.  I know they are watched over and over again.  This has given our families the chance to watch our boys at all their stages of life as many times as they wanted.  Also, for the boys they can watch them and be reminded of who everyone is and see that indeed they do know these people because there is video and pictures of them together.

4.  Send lots of cards and care packages.  Being here in the lower 48 we have sort of gotten away from this one but I know come January we will start up again.  Letting the kids pick out cards or little trinkets of the foreign place will help them feel like they are sharing their life with grandma and grandpa, aunts and uncles.  Oh, and don’t forget to include a color sheet or two.  The families love those the best!

5.  Keep lots of pictures of family all over the house.  We have pictures everywhere! This isn’t so much because I enjoy the clutter (or dusting) but I because I like for our boys to see their family everyday.  When a family visit was approaching we used to sit with the boys and show them who we were going to see.  The boys when they were toddlers loved looking at the pictures and talking about their family.

6.  Be overly excited for family visits.  For me this is tough. I’m hard on myself and I want everything to perfect when family comes to us.  For those visits where we travel, well, they are long and by the time we arrive everyone is done and tired! But, if you are excited and happy your children will follow suit.  I’ver really had come to peace with not having the perfect house or knowing I will be tired after two days of driving because at the end of the day you get to see the people that are the most important to you…. Family!

In closing I want to share that mother and grandparents will be visiting this coming week and my house is far from perfect.  However, I’m really okay with that because I truly am excited to see them.  More so than I have been in a long time.  It is most likely because I know that our time being close is dwindling and I’m sucking up as much as I can.  My boys were so excited they haven’t been going to sleep at a good hour and waking up early.  Family is a precious thing and I’m so lucky to have the relationship that with that we do.

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Five Reason to NOT Live This Life

Posted on August 10, 2012 | Leave a comment

A couple of months ago I wrote why I love living a military life, and it’s true.  I’ve said it many times in this blog so far BUT there are things that make it hard….. really, really hard.  Most will say that with all endeavors we love, there are the dark sides.  Sides that make us pause and question our decisions in life.  Right now I’m having one of those moments where the dark side of military life is speaking loud and clear and I am questioning why I like it.  Here are the reasons, the dark ones, to not live this life.

1.  The constant good-byes.  Well, they aren’t true “good-byes”, more like “see ya, laters” but it is the moment where you must turn your back and continue on with life without someone you love.  The most difficult are our spouses, parents and our military families we treat like family.  Those moments never get easier…. NEVER!

2.  Having to take our children from a life they love.  Military children form fast friendships and partake in sports they love and go to schools with teachers that inspire them.  It is a sad moment when you have to tell your children that you will be moving them from those people or that those people are moving away from them.  There is nothing you can do to comfort them as they take a leap of faith and hope that they will make another friend, have a teacher they love or a join a winning sports team.

3.  Looking for new doctors and dentists.   For the first time in my Navy life I’m being seen at a civilian dental practice and I LOVE THEM!  They have been great with our boys and just all around great people work in this practice.  So, looking forward to our upcoming PCS next year I’m feeling pains of having to leave a practice I’m thrilled with and hope to find a new one that meets the standard I expect.

4.  Making new friends.  For some people this isn’t a big deal.  They are outgoing and likable but me… not so much.  I tend to be reserved and hold back on warming up to new people.  It seems that after I finally find one or two people that will have my back, they become my sisters, then they leave or I leave.  It is sad and hard and I’m dreading having to leave friends here and make new ones.

5.  The packing and unpacking.  It is true that I enjoy cleaning out our home and getting ready for our move but it is a lot of work and each time I pray the Navy gives me the time to do it.  I also stress about where our kids will be.  Will they be in school or with a sitter or home with us? Which one is better?  Then there is the moment you take a look at your new home and wonder if all your stuff will fit.  And of course, there are the boxes and paper….. Some people like when the packers take all the stuff away but after having to organize a house with piles of stuff everywhere because the packers just put stuff anywhere, I’ll take this one on no matter how much I don’t like it.

So, there we have it.  Five reasons that make me question why I continue to follow the man I love and live this life.  They are small sacrifices that I don’t mind dealing with but when I have to face them I can’t help but resent my military life.  But, then I remind myself of all the great things especially the most important, my husband.  It might be a military life I live but it wouldn’t be much of a life at all without him.  So, when I am feeling resentful and angry because I have to say “good-bye” to my family, I will pour a glass of wine, sit on my porch and chat with a friend and hope to feel better the next day.

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Happy Father’s Day to Military Dads

Posted on June 15, 2012 | 1 Comment

With Father’s Day being on Sunday I am going to deter from my usually format and write about how great our Military dads are.  It isn’t easy being a dad on Active Duty and I know this because I witness how much my husband misses with our boys.  He has missed birthdays, Scouting promotions, sports events and much more.  Yet, somehow he is always there, too.  My husband manages to be heavily involved in all aspects of our children’s lives. It all started when our oldest son went to pre-school. He was on the Executive Board because partaking in the regular mandatory volunteer hours wasn’t enough!  Being the snack parent for soccer wasn’t good enough either, he had to coach even though he didn’t know how.  Think he could  just  be a parent that sees to it that our Cub Scout went door to door selling popcorn?  No, not my husband!  He served as the Ass. Cub Scout Master and now the Committee Chair.  He can’t always be in the boys classrooms at school for all their various events but he sure knows what is going!  He serves on a board there, too.

Sure, my husband does a lot but you know what?  So do most Mildads!  It amazes me the amount of fathers who will work long days and then come home scoop up their children and head out the door to coach their sports teams, be leaders for their Boy Scout Packs, hold positions on the PTO and so much more.  These guys might miss out on so much of their children’s lives but they also give up so much of their own free time if means doing something with their children.  I am completely in awe of these men who coach soccer teams in uniform or sacrifice their lunch break for a school event.

Our military children are so lucky to have men like these to look up to; with such honor and dedication to not just country but also family.  In our home the sun rises and sets on my husband.  He is a hero to our children and I believe it is because he does so much for them to ensure they are well rounded.  My husband will work a long ten hour day and come home tired and yet, he will play video games, throw footballs, teach them to ride their bikes and read bedtime stories.  It’s no wonder our boys admire him so much. But, this is how our mildads role!  No day is too long and tiring to not spend an hour playing with their children and escape the troubles of their jobs.

Happy Father’s Day Mildads!!! Especially my husband; today is in honor of you!

What amazing things do your husband’s do for your children despite their hectic military careers?

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